The Pains of Growing Up


The Pains of Growing Up:

There comes a time in the life where the sinking reality becomes our reality.
Where our life is no longer ours,
when we are committed to the abundance of busyness,
when our time is taken with the virtually necessary things.

I have seen many who strive for this called simple life,
one where they can sustain their needs by the work of their hands,
this dream called most often, sustainability,
Sustainability, this age’s new religion.
Though virtues it has, it lacks details of the reality.
That sinking reality.

That reality that comes from living within the rigid and tough boundaries of a fallen world,
the ideals and eternity set within our hearts knows better,
than to accept the sinking reality as ours to own.

However, the systems of a fallen world live on,
must we submit to the schemes and things?
Where our lives no longer surround our own desires,
where the constant simple sort of war takes place in the balance of costs and prices,
those that measure all.

Somewhere between losing life to a system and losing life to a mirage,
I battle on, this raging war inside myself.
I simply cannot live in the future of ideals and could be’s,
I have lived in that world before,
and it left me presently constantly wandering.
I simply cannot live imprisoned in the system that is the sinking reality,
though it remains as a reality today, now, in this hour,
so the question is how?

How can we balance stacks of papers longing to be sorted, and dishes to do, when remains still the books to be read,  journals to be written, songs to be practiced, paintings to be splashed, dances to be formed, friends to be joyous with and a prayer to be lifted?

How, I ask, how?

How can we get past a mirage of the could be’s and actually face what we are presently given?  Is living out of dreams a truth that sustains from the present discontentment of systems?

I think not.

I think not.  Perhaps my answer is such.  I think not.  To remove myself from thinking.

Of course, not in a permanent sort of sense, but as a temporary relief from the unfulfilling mirages and the sinking systems.

Meditate in your heart upon your bed and be still.

Yes, Psalm 4:4, perhaps that is what I must do.

Thank you.


,M




Comments

You're discovering yourself. Just remember that there is nothing you MUST do, and nothing you HAVE to be a part of. In all aspects of life, you have choices.
Afan said…
Yes, good to remove yourself from the busyness of life at times and just think. Or let your mind and body just "be." Acceptance of some of the things we cannot change is part of all our growing.
Love,
Mom